W—O—R—K W-O... R... K!
工作 Work.
今天大家要说出 父母从事什么… Today we're going to share what our parents do for...
工作！ Work!
我妈是医生 My mommy is a doctor.
我爸是卡车司机 My daddy is a truck driver.
我妈是老师 My mom's a teacher.
你爸呢? And your dad?
我爸… Mmm. My dad--
他是个骗子 He's... a liar.
骗子? A-A liar? Oh, l'm sure
他应该不是骗子吧 you don't mean a liar.
他穿西装上法庭和法官说话 Well, he wears a suit and goes to court and talks to the judge.
我明白了，他是个律师 Oh! l see. You mean he's a lawyer.
费奇，怎么样? Hey, Fletcher. How'd it go?
我刚替无辜老百姓洗清冤情 Just another victory for the wrongly accused.
才怪 Yeah, right.
李先生，你还要吗? Mr. Reede, great job. Do you want your coat back?
留着吧，你以后还会用得上 No, l'm sure you'll be needing it again and again.
李先生，你有空吗? Do you have a moment?
我有事，今天我得陪儿子 l'm late. lt's my day to be with my son.
记者想和你谈谈今天的胜诉 A couple of reporters want to talk about your big win.
是吗？我帅吗? Yeah? How's my hair?
你帅呆了 Fabulous. You look great.
几点了? What time is it?
你爸一定有事耽搁了 l am sure your dad just got held up in court again.
爸 Dad!
小麦面包 Maximilian!
你好吗，小不点儿? Hey, how ya doing, creep?
很好 Good.
我也是，只是我的手好奇怪 Me too, except my arm has been bothering me.
不好了 Oh, no, Dad!
没错，我的手变成“魔掌” Oh, yeah. lt's becoming a claw!
什么也阻止不了“魔掌” Nothing can stop the claw!
快逃吧，快逃命吧 Run, boy, run! Save yourself!
快用魔掌抓住妈妈 Do the claw to Mom! Do the claw to Mom!
你找到魔掌的弱点 Uh-oh. You found the claw's only weakness.
冷冰冰的脸孔 Subzero temperatures!
你是找不到地方吗? So, did you have any trouble finding the place?
我迟到了，抱歉 Okay, l'm late. l'm sorry.
车子没油了，油表一定坏了 我被困在黑人区 l ran out of gas. The gauge is broken. Rough neighborhood too.
幸好我有兄弟的记号 Good thing l was wearing neutral gang colors.
否则我就得劫车逃亡 l might have had to pull out my nine and bust a cap.
要钱不要命，要命不要钱 My mind and my money and my money and my mind
道上兄弟不会伤你 你是他们的律师 They would never hurt you, Fletcher. You're their lawyer.
你真阴险，我得小心防备 That was below the belt. Keep the gloves up.
妈，爸要带我去看摔角 Mom, Dad's taking me to see wrestling!
费奇 Oh, Fletcher!
奥卓莉 Oh, Audrey!
你真是不应该 摔角太暴力了 Why do you have to take him to see that stuff? lt's very violent.
这孩子得成为好汉 The boy must grow to be a warrior.
马场先生才是他的好榜样 Who better to guide him than Rick Rude... and Randy Macho-man Savage in the cage of death?
真是巧 Oh, good!
杰利，你好吗? Jerry, how's it going?
小船长，看看你 Hey, gipper!
你又长高了 You look like you grow by the minute!
费奇，你好 Fletcher, pleasure to see you.
嗨，亲爱的 Hi, honey!
这种场面真感人 Wow. That was a nice image.
没了 Deleted.
我帮你拿了纸箱 l have some more boxes for you.
你真好 Oh, you're an angel.
纸箱? 是啊 Boxes? Remember,
我跟你说过杰利要搬到 波士顿 l told you a few weeks ago, Jerry's moving to Boston.
没错，那份新工作 Oh, right! The job, the thing.
你是干什么的? What do you do again?
医院行政人员 Hospital administrator.
是了 Right, right!
纸箱在车上 Well, the boxes are in my car.
不急，不急 Oh, those can wait.
我答应你一件事，对吧? l made this young man a promise, didn't l?
有空陪我玩球吗? Got time to throw a few?
当然有 Sure!
来吧 Come on, then!
我忘了你男友要搬家 l forgot the boyfriend was moving. Jerry!
他的名字叫杰利 他是要搬家 His name is Jerry! And yes, he's moving.
真可惜，我没那么讨厌他 l'm sorry. l hated him less than your other boyfriends.
你们不是来真的吧? lt wasn't serious, was it?
差不多 Semiserious, yes.
你们没有…那个吧? You guys aren't-You know--
我们交往七个月，当然有 l have been dating him for seven months. What do you think?
真的吗? Really? Ooh!
我以为你嫁给我就爽够了 l was hoping after being married to me you'd have no strength left.
当时只有你爽，我可没爽到 Remember, when we were married, l wasn't having sex nearly as often as you were.
我又被重击一拳 And the ref takes a point away.
好 Yeah
丢高点 Out!
好 Yeah
麦斯会想念他 Max is gonna miss him.
我还在啊 l'll be here.
准备好了吗？发球！ Ready? Yeah! Play ball.
麦斯，咱们走吧 Max, come on. We've gotta go.
爸，真的要去看摔角吗? Dad, are we really going to wrestling?
当然，麦斯佛陀 Absolutely, Max Factor.
我先去办公室一下 We just have to stop by the office for one minute.
先生，有零钱吗? Excuse me, sir. Any spare change?
抱歉，我没有 Oh, l'm sorry. l'm all out.
我办不到 l can't do it.
你必须做出最有力的辩护 Fred, it's your duty to present the strongest case possible.
这必须符合事实 The strongest case possible consistent with the truth.
判断是非是法官的职责 Will you let the judge decide what's true?That's what he gets paid for.
你的职责是帮被告胜诉 You get paid to win.
如果你坚持要我出庭 lf you insist that l take it to trial,
我将依法为柯太太辩护 l will represent Mrs. Cole aggressively and ethically.
但是我不肯说谎 But Miranda, l won't lie.
那我就得找肯说谎的人 Then we'll just have to find someone who will.
二十一楼，男装部 Twenty-first floor. Men's wear.
你好 Hi, Mr. Reede! Whoa!
你换了发型? Hey. Did you do something to your hair?
太夸张了，对吧? lt's a bit extreme, isn't it?
不会呀 No!
现在正流行 That's the thing nowadays, right?
这能突出我的脸型 He said it would accent my facial features.
没错，它让你的脸型很突出 That's what it does!lt completely accents your facial features.
我们要去办公室 We're just gonna go to my office
费奇 Hey, Fletcher.
嘿，彼特 Hey, Pete.
你瘦了一点 You losing a little weight?
也许是吧 l don't know. Maybe.
你越来越帅，越来越有魅力 Looks and personality. A double-threat guy.
李先生 Hey, Mr. Reede.
嘿，老兄 Hey... man.
我叫兰迪 lt's, uh, Randy.
我知道 Yeah, l know.
你午饭要吃什么? Taking lunch orders. Anything?
不了 No, thanks.
我早餐吃太饱 肚子快胀破了 l had so much for breakfast, l'm ready to pop.
我是说，我还不饿 l mean, l'm full.
太好了 Okay. Great.
麦斯 Max!
嗨，葛妲 Hi, Greta.
你好吗? Hey, what's new?
明天我生日，我要开派对 lt's my birthday tomorrow, and we're having a party.
你爸一定会送你生日礼物 Wow! l am sure your daddy has got you something wonderful.
真的吗? Yeah?
当然是真的 Yeah, you bet! Listen, kiddo.
听着，到我的办公室玩 把每个人都告到破产 Why don't you play in my office for a minute. Sue somebody for everything they've got.
或是传真给你的小女友 Maybe you can send a fax to one of your girlfriends.
对不起 Hey, sorry.
该死，我都忘了 Damn it! l completely forgot.
很正常 Oh, what a surprise.
你真是圣人，我该送你礼物 You are a saint. l should buy you a gift.
你送了 You did.
没有你不行，有人找我吗? l always do the classy thing. Any calls?
资料部要你的档案 The Drawlings' clerk needs your filing.
骗他说我寄了 Tell him it's in the mail.
好的，他下周会收到 Right. You'll do it next week.
麦先生明天和你有约 Mr. McKinley phoned to confirm your meeting tomorrow.
扁桃腺发炎，不 我染上病毒 Strep throat. Some kind of virus. What's going around?
亚洲流行性感冒 Asian flu?
棒呆了 Good one.
你老妈找你 And your mother called.
我在休假 l'm on vacation.
五个礼拜了 lt's your fifth week.
我被大雪困住，电话断线 Snowed in. Phones are down.
伤老妈的心，没问题 Break mother's heart. Done. That's it.
还有，玛兰达在找你 Except Miranda's looking for you.
我得拍多少马屁 才能当合伙人 How much ass do l have to kiss to make partner?
跟她说我摔断腿，必须住院 Tell her l broke my leg and l had to be shot.
你自己跟她说吧 Tell her yourself.
再发出我胜诉的消息 And then send out a notice of judgement on my win today!
马上办 l'll get right on it.
玛兰达，我没看到你 Miranda! Hey, l didn't see you.
你今天真美 You look beautiful today.
来，送你的礼物 Here! l bought you a gift.
谢了 Oh, thanks.
听说你今天胜诉，恭喜了 l heard about your victory. Congratulations.
你让合伙委员会刮目相看 You're making quite an impression on the partnership committee.
没错，你们又要开会 That's right! You folks are meeting soon.
我最近太忙，根本没想到 l've been so busy, l haven't even thought about it.
办公室有客人，我得进去了 Anyway. l have a client in my office. Better not keep him waiting.
费奇，有件案子很重要 Actually, something rather important's just come up.
你今晚有空吧? Um, you're not busy tonight, are you?
去不成了，对吧? We're not going, are we?
奥卓莉 Audrey.
人生有些重要的时刻 You know how there are moments you know are critical?
你必须做出影响一生的抉择 And choices that have to be madeupon which all one's future happiness will depend?
现在就是重要时刻 This is one of those moments.
你想说什么? What are you trying to say?
你愿意嫁给我吗? Will you marry me?
你马上要搬走 You're moving.
我知道 我要你和麦斯跟我走 l know, but l want you and Max to come with me.
我想了很久 Audrey, l've been giving this a lot of thought.
我也不是一时心血来潮 You know l'm not prone to wild flights of romantic fancy.
你和我结婚是最好的抉择 Mmm. But the thought of you and l together just makes sense.
我们俩的感情很成熟 Now l'm ready. l think you're ready.
我爱麦斯，你更爱他 l love Max. You love Max.
时机再好不过了 lt's right. lt fits.
怎么样? So what do you say?
小不点儿，生日快乐 Hey, creepy. Happy birthday.
你几岁了?22?23? How old are you now, 22 or 23?
我才五岁 l'm five, Dad. Okay.
好吧，把啤酒退回去 Return the beer keg.
请脱衣舞娘走人 Cancel the dancing girls.
我现在该怎么办? l don't know what l'm gonna do. l feel completely unprepared for this.
我替你买了礼物，可是昨晚 You see, l bought you a present, but last night...
我不小心吞了下去 l accidentally swallowed it.
爸，它在你肚子 Dad, it's in your belly!
退后 Scalpel.
希望还没完全消化 l hope it's not partially digested!
小心了 Ooh! Look out!
酷毙了 Cool!
这是什么? What is it?Cool!
这是个…惊喜 lt's-lt's a surprise.
好啦，是匹小马，快拆开吧 All right, it's a pony. Just open it!
让我帮忙，我也等不及 l'm gonna help, 'cause l can't stand it!
棒球手套！ Baseball stuff!
酷毙了 Cool!
可以玩吗？我当野茂英雄 Can we play?l'll be Nomo.
你当荷西坎塞柯，好吗? You can be Jose Canseco. Can we play?
当然可以 Absolutely.
好耶 Yeah!
生日派对过后，咱们就去玩 Right after your party tonight, we'll do it.
就我们两个 You and me.
我现在得专心做事 l just have to really concentrate on this right now.
生日快乐 Hey! Happy birthday.
谢了，妈 Thanks, Mom.
生日快乐，麦斯 Happy birthday, Max!
一、二、三、四、五 One, two, three, four, five.
祝你好运 And one for good luck!
他打孩子，看到吗? He struck the child. Did you see that?
这是爸给我的 Look at what Dad got me!
棒呆了 Whoa! Great!
我车上有手套 Hey, l have my glove in the car.
咱们待会到公园玩球，如何? Maybe we can stop at the park on the way home and play catch.
晚上再抹油，用橡皮筋套住 Then tonight we can rub oil in it and wrap a big rubber band around it.
一定很好玩 lt'll be great.
你真好，老爸 Hey, great gift, Dad!
是啊，乖儿子 Thanks, son.
我的礼物让他们玩在一块儿 l'm so glad my gift could bring those two together.
我就快完全消失了 My plan to phase myself out is almost complete.
有件事我想跟你商量 Something's come up, and we need to talk.
快点，我想去玩球 Come on, Mom. l want to go play!
这件事很重要，今晚可以吗 And actually it's kind of important, so maybe we could talk tonight?
今晚? Tonight? Yes. Sure. Of course.
是啊，麦斯的生日派对 没错，当然可以 Max's birthday party. Oh! Yeah.
到时候再说 We'll talk then. Great!
麦斯威尔咖啡，我走了 Maximus! l'm outta here.
爸，再见 Bye, Dad.
杰利，好好地玩我老婆 Jerry, enjoy my wife.
很好，很高明 Well, this is good.
谢谢夸奖 This is really smart. Thank you. Only--
只是，这都不是真的 这是问题吗? Well, it's not true. Does that present a problem?
柯太太，唯一的问题是 Mrs. Cole, the only problem here...
你全心全意抚养他的孩子 is that after you've provided years of faithful service and loving support,
真是他的孩子吧? of raising his children-they are his?
其中一个绝对是 Huh? Oh. Yeah, yeah. One for sure.
你先生却不让你分享 他的财产 After all that, your husband wants to deny you...
只因为你在外面有一个… 七个 a fair share of the assets based on one act of indiscretion. Seven.
什么? Pardon me?
我在外面有过七个男人 Seven single acts of indiscretion.
你有七个男人 他只逮到一个 Seven acts of indiscretion, only one of which he has any evidence of...
况且这全是他的错 and all of which he himself is responsible for.
是吗? He is? Mrs. Cole.
柯太太，你才是受害者 你先生只爱工作不爱美人 You're the victim here. The wife of a cold, distant workaholic.
你被逼的 投向一个男人的怀抱 Starved for affection, driven into the arms of another man!
七个男人 Seven.
管他的 Yeah, whatever!
你也不想占他的便宜 You're not trying to deny him what is rightfully his.
你只想得到应有的补偿 All you're insisting on is what is rightfully yours. Yeah.
也许再要求多一点 And maybe a... fraction more.
你已经够委屈了 l think you're bending over backwards.
没错 Yeah.
况且我愿意和他 共同抚养孩子 l did offer to give him joint custody of the kids.
因为他是个好父亲 He is, after all, a wonderful father.
他却这样对待你? And how does he repay you?
狠狠的告你一状 By dragging you through a painful litigation process!
不行，你绝不能让他得逞 No, no, no, no! This can't happen!
请别介意 这不是你一人的事 With all due respect, this isn't about you and Mr. Cole anymore.
这攸关所有女性的权益 This is about all women.
要是蒂娜透纳 只会跟她丈夫说 Where would Tina Turner be right now if she'd rolled over and said,
狠狠的打我吧 "Hit me again,
她就没有今天的成就 lke, and put some stank on it?"
她只会变成河里的浮尸 Rolling on the river, that's where she'd be.
可是她决定给男人个教训 But she's beyond Thunderdome, because she decided to send a message.
觉醒吧，姐妹们 Wake up, sisters! There's no-o-o-o-o-o...
女人可不是好欺负的 such thing as a weaker sex!
你说的对，李先生 You know what?
我受够男人的气了 You're right, Mr. Reede. l am tired of getting kicked around!
这才对 Good for you!
谢谢你 Thank you.
我终于找到能够信赖的律师 l am so grateful... to have an attorney l can trust.
你真高竿，真是没话说 Oh, you are good. You are very, very good.
这件案子能让事务所赚大钱 The Cole case is worth a truckload of money to this firm.
要是你胜诉 就能成为合伙人 lf you win, l guarantee you'll make partner.
这样吧 ln fact,
你现在不如先跟我“合伙” how would you like to make... a partner right now, hmm?
这个嘛，我不应该… Oh, l don't know. l should--
我今天真是…真是… Happy, happy, happy happy, happy, happy
…快乐得不得了 Happy l'm so happy today
甜心，你考虑过我的提议吗 l live in the U. S. A. So honey? Have you, uh, thought about--
考虑过 好极了 我不能跟你去 You know, what we talked about? Uh, yeah. l can't go.
什么？为什么? What? Wh-Why not?
为了麦斯 Because of Max.
他一定会很乐 But he'll love it there.
我会带他去球场 l'm gonna take him to Fenway Park.
跟他一起爬山、露营 There's hiking and camping--
其实都是因为… Well, really, it's...
费奇 Fletcher.
费奇？少来了 Fletcher? Come on, honey.
你不开口，他都不会来 He wouldn't even come over unless you reminded him.
可是他每次来 麦斯都好开心 l know, but when he does come over, Max is so happy.
他们的感情很好 lt's like they have their own little world together.
我和麦斯的感情也很好 The gipper and l have that too!
我知道，可是那不同 l know, but it's different.
怎么说? How? Well--
他会扮魔掌 He does the claw.
什么玩意? The what?
魔掌 The claw.
像是这样 You know, it's like this--
快逃命呀 l don't-Run for you life.
魔掌来了 lt's the claw! The claw!
我学得不像，这不重要 l can't really do it that good. That's not the point.
重要的是 The point is...
他们以后就不能再见面了 if they're 3, 000 miles apart, they're never gonna see each other.
费奇才不会去波士顿 Fletcher's never gonna come to Boston.
奥卓莉? Hello. Audrey?
你在哪儿？我们都在等你 Fletcher! Where are you?
麦斯要等你来才肯切蛋糕 We're waiting. Max won't cut the cake until you get here.
真该死 Um-Oh, man!
公司突然有急事 Actually, something has come up. l've--
有件案子很重要 l've got this problem on a new case.
怎么回事? What happened?
没事 Nothing!
我撞到脚趾 l stubbed my toe on the desk!
对不起，我没办法赶到 l'm really sorry, but l just can't make it.
老板快把我…操死了 The boss is, uh, really riding me.
今天是他的生日 Fletcher, it's his birthday!
我知道 l know, l know.
我会补偿的，明天我去接他 l'll make it up to him, l promise. l'll pick him up from school tomorrow, okay?
你要去接他? You're gonna pick him up?
没错 Yes!
我去叫他听 All right, hold on a minute.
你可以祝他生日快乐 You can say happy birthday.
不行，我得走了 No! Gotta go!
再见 Good-bye.
祝你生日快乐 Hello. Happy birthday to you
祝你生日快乐，麦斯 Happy birthday, dear Max
祝你生日快乐 Happy birthday to you
小寿星，许个愿 Okay, birthday boy. Make a wish.
来嘛，你什么愿都能许 Come on, Max. lt can be anything you want. Anything in the whole world.
麦斯，你爸爸得上班 Max. Your father is sorry. He had to work.
他答应我要来的 He said he was gonna be here. He promised.
我知道 l know,
他保证明天会来看你 but he promises that he is gonna see you tomorrow.
他会去接你下课 Okay? He's gonna pick you up from school. All right?
来嘛，许个愿 So come on. Make a wish.
我希望爸爸有一天能不说谎 l wish that for only one day... Dad couldn't tell a lie.
昨晚真棒，你爽不爽? Mmm. That was incredible. Was it good for you?
别人让我更爽 l've had better.
别人让我更爽? "l've had better"?
有没有搞错? "l've had better."
你也住这儿? New in the building?
我刚搬来 Yeah, l just moved in Monday.
你还习惯吧? Oh! You like it so far?
这儿的邻居都很好 Everybody's been real nice.
那是因为你是波霸 Well, that's because you have big jugs.
我是说你的咪咪很大 l mean, your boobs are huge.
我是说我很想摸一把 l mean, l wanna squeeze 'em.
妈咪 Mama.
你有零钱吗? Any change, mister?
当然有 Absolutely.
请你赏我一些 Could you spare some?
没问题 Yes, l could.
拜托 Will ya? How come? Mm-mm.
不行，你会拿去买醉 Because l believe you will buy booze with it!
我可不想面对西方文明的堕落 l just wanna get to the office without being confronted by the decay of Western society!
而且我很小气 Plus, l'm cheap!
王八蛋 Jerk off!
你今天气色不太好 You look like you're having a rough morning.
答对了，她得到什么奖品? Ding, ding, ding! What do we have for her, Johnny?
费奇 Fletcher.
黛娜 Dana.
莎曼珊，你要多少才肯罢手 All right, Samantha. How much will it take to put an end to all this?
你一半的财产 Fifty percent of your estate.
一半? Fifty percent?
婚前协议加上她红杏出墙 With a pre-nup and proof of adultery?
你要怎样辩护? What's your case?
我要这样辩护… Our case is simply this.
B-M--B-M-- B-M--B-M--
n-n-- N-n-
h-h-- H-h-
l-l-l- l-l-
不好笑 Very funny, Fletcher!
你想来硬的，我随时奉陪 You wanna play hardball? l'm game.
你搞什么鬼？你有毛病吗? What are you doing? What is wrong with you?
请起立 All rise
正直的史马歇法官 for the Honorable Judge Marshall Stevens.
正直个屁 Honorable?
早安 Good morning.
BD09395一案 Call case number BD-09395.
柯莎曼珊控告柯理察 Samantha Cole vs. Richard Cole.
两位律师好吗? How are we doing this morning, Counsel?
很好 Fine. Thank you.
你呢，李先生? And you, Mr. Reede? .
我昨晚在床上没爽到 l'm a little upset about a bad sexual episode last night
你很年轻 这事以后还会发生 Well, you're still young. lt'll happen more and more.
现在让我们办正事吧 ln the meantime, what do you say we get down to business?
首先，你的委托人… First, Mr. Reede, l see--
庭上，我要求延期 l would like a continuance!
此案已拖延了好几次 This case has been delayed several times, Mr. Reede.
我知道，我真的很想延期 l realize that, Your Honor, but l would really, really like a continuance.
你必须有很好的理由 l'll have to hear good cause, Counsel.
你有什么问题? What's the problem?
我不能说谎 l can't lie!
我很佩服，不过你的理由呢 Commendable, Mr. Reede, but l'm waiting to hear good cause.
你有没有正当理由? Do you have one or not?
没有 Not.
我拒绝延期的动议 Motion for continuance denied.
此案有和解的可能吗? ls there any chance of a settlement in this case?
应该没有，庭上 l don't think so, Your Honor.
柯先生愿意付两百四十万元 Mrs. Cole is already to pay for $2400000
李先生却坚持不肯… But Mr. Reede has made it clear he has no desire--
和解！我要和解！ Settle!Settle, settle, settle, settle!
我不想和解，李先生 l don't want to settle.
你昨天说我才是受害人 Mr. Reede. You convinced me yesterday, l'm the victim!
我被逼向另一个男人的怀抱 l'm starved for affection. l'm driven into the arms of another man.
七个男人 Seven!
管他的 Yeah, whatever.
用你的说法肯定能胜诉 With the story you came up with, l don't think we can lose.
我要打这场官司 l want to proceed.
柯太太，你不明白 Mrs. Cole, you don't understand.
李先生，你们愿意和解吗? Mr. Reede. Do we have a settlement?
不愿意 No!
不愿意，庭上 No, Your Honor.
不愿意和解 There's no settlement.
下午一点半开庭 Trial to commence 1:30 sharp.
是我放的屁 lt was me!
李先生 Hi, Mr. Reede!
喜欢我的新打扮吗? Like the new dress?
至少没你的发型那么逊 Whatever takes the focus off your head.
你好吗? What's up, Fletcher?
你快被胆固醇害死了 Your cholesterol, fatty! Dead man walking.
嘿，费奇 Hey, Fletcher.
你这小角色没人记得 Hey! You're not important enough to remember.
你要吃什么? What's it gonna be, Mr. Reede?
青春痘 A pockmark, eventually!
别再问了，老天爷 Don't ask! For God's sakes, don't ask.
你一定能克服 All right. You can beat this.
有志者事竟成 lt's all a matter of willpower!
做个小测验 A test. Something small.
这是红笔，专心点 Red. Red. All right? Now focus.
这支笔的颜色是… The color of this pen is r-r-r--
这支笔的颜色是… The color of this pen...
是红色 is re-e-e-e-e--
红… Re-e-e-e--
我手上这支笔的颜色是… The color of the pen that l hold in my hand...
蓝色 is r-r-r-r-r-r-royal blue!
这点小谎我都不会说 One lie, and l can't say it!
我要用写的 l'll write it.
“这是支…”
给我写，否则我把手打断 Write it! Write it, or l'll break it off!
“蓝笔”
不是吧 Agh! No!
别这样 Come on! Stop it.
老板，怎么了? Boss? What happened?
这支笔是蓝色的 The pen is blue. The pen is blue!
这支笔是蓝色的 The goddamn pen is blue!
李先生，你没事吧? Mr. Reede, are you all right?
我得回家 l gotta go home.
案子和解了? Home? Was the case settled?
没有，一点半得出庭 No! l have to be in court at 1:30!
你怎么能回家? Then how are you going to go home?
我不晓得 l don't know. l don't know.
好吧 Okay.
邓检察官来电 Uh, Mr. Reede, Reuben and Dunn called.
他要知道和解条件还有效吗 They need to know where the Darby settlement offer stands.
我只是想耍他一下 l just proposed a settlement to dick with them!
耍他一下，记下来了 Dick with them. Got it.
你母亲来电 And your mother called.
你还在休假吗? Are you still on vacation?
没有 No.
你回来上班了? Then you're here?
当然 Yes.
谢谢你澄清这点 Thank you for clearing that up, sir.
你前妻来电问你 几时去接儿子 And your ex-wife called. She wants to know when you're coming to pick up your son.
我真是浑蛋 Oh, l'm such a shit!
喂? 奥卓莉 Hello. Audrey?
嗨，你还要去接麦斯吗? Fletcher, hi. Are you still picking Max up from school today?
不行，我的案子没和解 Here's the thing. l really can't!
下午我得出庭 l had a case l was certain would settle, and it didn't, and l have to go to court.
才怪 Right.
是真的，我很想去接麦斯 lt's true! l really want to see Max today!
可是我没办法 l really do.
因为你老是临时有事 Uh-huh, but things just keep coming up at the last minute.
可是这次不同 Yes, but this time it's different.
是吗？怎么说? l see. How is that?
这次我说的是实话 Now l'm telling the truth.
昨晚你没说实话? And last night you weren't.
没错 那你在干嘛? Well, what were you doing?
和女人上床 Having sex!
希望她是你心爱的女人 Well, l hope that it was with someone very special.
不是 我根本就不喜欢她 不过她是我老板 No! That's the thing. l don't even like her, but she's a partner.
我想我可以取悦她来升职 l thought l could help my career by making her squeal.
我到底是怎么了? What's wrong with me?
我是罪有应得、活该倒霉 l'm getting what l deserve. l'm reaping what l sow. l'm--
爸会来接我吗? ls Dad still picking me up?
不会 No, Max, he's not.
对不起，不过我会去接你 l'm sorry, but l'm gonna pick you up, okay?
我会想办法 l'll work it out.
我的愿望没有实现 l guess my wish didn't come true.
什么愿望? What wish?
我希望爸爸有一天能不说谎 l wished that for just one day Dad couldn't tell a lie.
麦斯 Max?
我要和你说一件很重要的事 l have something important to talk to you about, okay?
好吧 Okay. Okay.
喂? Hello?
让我解释，我一定出了问题 Audrey! Let me explain. Something has happened to me.
你还有别的问题 Well, something else is about to happen to you.
我和麦斯要搬到波士顿 Max and l are moving to Boston.
什么? What?
杰利向我求婚 Jerry has asked me to marry him,
我们要跟他去看房子 and Max and l are going this weekend to look at houses.
我以为你们还没论及婚嫁 l thought it was semiserious!
我们现在是认真的 lt's just been given a violent shove into serious.
你们不能去 我会见不到麦斯 You can't move to Boston; l'll never see Max!
那样跟现在有什么分别? You'll have the same relationship you have with him now, won't you?
你在哪里? Where are you?
我正要回家 l'm going home.
你千万别出门 When you get there, just stay there.
我马上过去，我们得谈谈 l'm coming over. We have to talk.
费奇 Fletcher!
我马上到 l'll be right there.
李先生 Hey, Mr. Reede- La, la, la, la
La la La, la, la, la
费奇 Fletcher.
我的老天 Holy hell!
你逃不出我的手掌心 You can run, but you can't hide.
你搞什么? What's your problem, schmuck?
我是个自私的浑蛋 l'm an inconsiderate prick!
可恶 Oh, shit!
惨了 Shit!
你知道为何被拦下来吗? You know why l pulled you over?
这要看你跟了我多久 Depends on how long you were following me!
咱们从头开始 Why don't we take it from the top?
拿去吧 Here goes.
我超速、闯红灯、差点撞车 l sped, l followed too closely, l ran a stop sign,
我又超速、没有让行人先走 l almost hit a Chevy, l sped some more,
没打方向灯就换车道 l failed to yield,
然后我又超速闯红灯 l changed lanes without signaling while speeding!
还有没有? ls that all?
还有 No.
我有未缴的违规停车罚单 l have unpaid parking tickets.
拿去 Be gentle.
奥卓莉，等等 Audrey! Wait!
等一下 Wait, Audrey. Ooh!
等等，等等 Hold on. Wait!
我终于知道，我发疯了 Wait. l just had an insight into myself. l'm crazy.
你说你马上赶来 还要我等你 You call and say,"Wait, l'll be right over,"
荒谬的是，我竟然乖乖地等 and here's the crazy part-l actually wait.
我可以解释 l can explain this.
我得赶去开会… l have missed a department meeting.
你搭计程车来的? Did you come in a cab?
没错 Yes!
你的车呢? Where's your car?
我真不知该怎么谢你 Thank you! l can't tell you how much this means to me.
还我 一千六百五十四块一毛七 l can. $1, 654. 11.
你不会良心不安吗? How do you sleep at night?
我要这玩意 l'm taking this.
你刮坏我的车子 You scratched my car!
哪儿? Where?
就在这儿 Right there!
那个嘛 Oh, there.
早就有了 That was already there.
你这… Why, you!
你这大骗子 You liar!
你知道我要怎样吗? -You know what l'm gonna do about this?
怎样? -What?
不怎么样 Nothing!
到法院告你只会浪费时间 Because if l take you to court, it'll drain eight hours out of my life,
你也不会出庭 and you won't show up,
就算我胜诉，你也会赖帐 and if l got the judgement, you'd just stiff me anyway!
所以我只能像个傻子生闷气 So l'm gonna piss and moan like an impotent jerk...
然后弯下腰，踢排气管出气 and then bend over and take it up the tailpipe!
这地方你来过，对吧? You been here before, haven't ya?
我玩得很愉快 我得去上课了 Well, l can't remember when l've had more fun, but if you'll excuse me, l have a class.
你是生我的气才要嫁给他? Are you marrying this guy because you're mad at me?
我是生你的气才跟你离婚 No, l divorced you because l was mad at you.
等一下，我们得谈谈 Wait. l want to talk about this!
你想谈什么? What do you want to say?
这家伙真的适合你吗? ls this guy right for you?
他一点都不像我 He is so... not me!
这是他最大的优点 That's one of his best qualities.
不过他很那个… But he's kind of a magoo.
对不起 l'm sorry.
你错了 他有时候的确有点… You're wrong. Sometimes maybe he is a little--
阿达 Magoo!
没错 Yes.
可是我们交往后… But since we've been going out--
我不想跟你谈这些 My God, l'm not having this conversation with you.
你不能离开，这不公平 Audrey, you can't go.
不公平？咱们就谈这点吧 This is not fair. Fair?
你骗儿子说 要去他的生日派对 Okay, let's define fair. Last night a five-year-old boy was crushed...
结果害他伤心欲绝 because his father lied to him about coming to his birthday party.
这公平吗? Fair?
昨晚的事… Last night--
…与我无关 谢谢你 Was none of my business. None of my business. Thank you.
两年前跟我有很大关系 Two years ago, it was my business.
不过我现在不在乎 But l don't have to care anymore.
这就是离婚的好处 That's the magic of divorce.
可是麦斯很在乎 But it matters to Max!
麦斯很在乎你的所作所为 Everything you do matters, and everything you don't do.
让我告诉你 我是很糟的父亲 All right. Now let me tell you something. l'm a bad father!
我是说 l mean--
我是个很糟的父亲 l'm a bad father.
你不是很糟的父亲 You're not a bad father...
你陪他的时候不是 when you show up.
等我出完庭就赶过来 陪他玩球 What if l come right after court and play ball?
咱们坐下来好好地谈谈 Then you and l can talk before you make any rash decisions!
不行，我们今晚就走 No, we are leaving tonight.
求求你再给我一次机会 Please, Audrey. Give me one more chance.
这是我的肺腑之言 l'm throwing myself on the mercy of the court.
我失去了你 l lost you,
求求你，别让我失去麦斯 but please don't make me lose Max too.
给我当个好父亲的机会 Give me a chance to be the father l started out to be.
你真的会来? You're really coming?
千真万确、绝不食言 几点钟? This is ironclad. This is the mother of all promises. What time?
六点整 Okay, 6:00.
五点五十分 Ten to six.
好吧 All right.
要是这次你再放麦斯的鸽子 All right. But if l tell Max that you're coming,
我又得看他伤心欲绝的模样 and you don't show up and l have to see that look on his face-that heartbreaking look--
我们就要去波士顿 we're going to Boston.
要是我爽约，我就替你打包 lf l don't show up, l'll pack you myself.
我会把你的行李包得好好的 l will lovingly wrap your nicknacks with bubble paper.
希望不会 l hope so.
你知道昨晚八点十五分 你儿子在做什么? Do you know what your son was doing at 8:15 last night?
他在许愿 He was making a birthday wish that for just one day...
他希望爸爸有一天能不说谎 his father couldn't tell a lie.
我的老天，这就对了 Oh, my God! That's it!
我不爱三明治 我不爱火腿蛋 "l do not like them, Sam l Am."l do not like green eggs and ham.
你爱别的东西吗? "Would you like them here or there?
我不爱… l would not like them--" Excuse me.
抱歉，我是麦斯的坏父亲… Hi. l'm Max's bad father-Er, l'm his father.
爸 Dad!
我能借用他一下吗? Could l borrow him for just one second?
大怪兽 Monster Max!
大恐龙，我们玩球好吗? You came to play catch?
现在不行 l'd like to,
我得跟你谈谈 but l can't. l gotta talk to you.
你昨晚许的愿望成真了 Your mommy told me about that wish you made last night. lt came true, Max.
真的吗？你得说实话啰? Really? You mean you have to tell the truth?
是啊 Yes.
你不会撒谎 No matter what?
绝对不会 No matter what!
摔角是真的吗? ls wrestling real?
奥运里是真的 电视上是假的 ln the Olympics, yes. On channel 23, no.
看电视坐太近，眼睛会瞎吗 Will sitting too close to the TV set make me go blind?
绝对不会 Not in a million years.
如果我一直做鬼脸 lf l keep making this face,
舌头会卡住吗? will it get stuck that way?
不会，有些人靠这技俩赚钱 Uh-uh. ln fact some people make a good living that way.
听着，你得帮我个忙 Now listen, Max. You've gotta do something for me.
你得收回那愿望 l need you to take back that wish.
你才能再说谎? So you can lie?
没错 Yes.
我不会对你说谎 But not to you.
你要明白 You see, Max,
有时候大人得说谎 sometimes grownups need to lie.
很难向你解释 lt's hard to explain, but if--
就像你妈怀你时胖了四十磅 Look, here's a good example. When your mommy was pregnant with you,
她大吃特吃，我被吓坏了 she gained 40 pounds; there was nothing she wouldn't eat.
她问我觉得如何 And Daddy was scared. But when she'd ask me,"How do l look?"
我却得说，你简直美呆了 l'd say,"Honey, you look great. You're glowing."
要是我说她像头母牛就惨了 lf l had told Mommy she looked like a cow, it would have hurt her feelings.
明白吗? Understand?
老师说内在美才重要 My teacher tells me real beauty's on the inside.
丑八怪才这么说 That's just something ugly people say.
大人不说谎就活不了 Max, no one can survive in the adult world if they have to stick to the truth.
我不能胜诉、不能升职 l could lose my case, l could lose my promotion,
还可能会丢掉差事 l could even lose my job.
我要你帮忙，好吗? Now, l need your help, Max.
好吧 Okay.
就像昨晚那样许愿 Okay. Do whatever you did last night,
这次你得收回愿望 only this time, make it an"unwish."
好了 l did it.
太好了，我得做个小测验 Excellent! Now, l just need a little test.
有用吗? -Did it work?
没有用 -Not like l'd hoped.
你收回愿望吗? Did you unwish it?
有呀，可是… Only--
可是什么? What? Only what?
昨晚我许的愿是真心的 Yesterday, when l wished it, l really meant it.
这次是你逼我 我才收回愿望 This time when l unwished it, l only did it 'cause you told me to.
好吧，再来一次 All right. Do it again.
这次你要真心真意 And this time, mean it.
我办不到 But l can't!
为什么? Why not?
我不要你说谎 'Cause l don't want you to lie.
我跟你说过，我得说谎 人人都说谎，你妈会说谎 l explained this. l have to lie. Everybody lies.
就连杰利也会说谎 Mommy lies. Even the wonderful Jerry lies.
可是只有你才会让我伤心 But you're the only one that makes me feel bad.
麦斯，上课了，进来吧 Max, recess is over. Come on in!
妈说我们要搬到波士顿 Mom says we're moving to Boston.
她还没有决定 That isn't for sure yet.
我今晚会到家里和她谈 She promised we'd talk about it tonight.
我会去的 l am coming!
你相信我吧? You believe me, don't you, Max?
待会见，小子 l'll see you later, buddy.
你（那话儿）还好吧? Fletcher. How's it hanging?
又皱又短，老垂到左边 Short, shriveled and always to the left.
豹哥来电，他又抢了银行 Boss, it's Skull. He knocked over another A. T. M.
他要你的专业建议 This time at knife-point. He needs your legal advice.
别再犯法了，痞子 Stop breaking the law, asshole!
老板，你还好吧? Boss, are you all right?
我儿子恨我 My son hates me.
他很爱你 Max loves you.
我看过你们，你是他的偶像 l've seen you together. You're his hero.
是吗? Oh, yeah?
昨晚他许下生日愿望 Last night at his birthday party, he made a wish...
他希望我有一天能不说谎 that l wouldn't be able to lie for one whole day.
孩子话 Kids.
成真了 lt came true.
什么? What? Max's wish!
麦斯的愿望成真了 lt came true.
也许你该休息几天 Boss, maybe you should just take a few days off.
你不觉得我今天有点怪吗? Greta! Didn't it seem weird to you that l kept telling the truth all morning?
是有点怪 Well, yeah. But--
你是说你不会说谎? What are you saying? That you are incapable of lying?
没错，我不会说谎 That's right! l am incapable of lying!
只有今天 Just for today?
直到今晚八点十五分 Apparently. 'Til 8:15 tonight.
这是二十四小时的诅咒 lt's one of those 24-hour curses.
才怪 Those are going around.
你不相信? You don't believe me, do you?
当然不信 Of course not.
真是好笑 How ironic!
尽管问 你认为我会说谎的问题 Okay. Ask me something you think l would normally lie about.
好吧，几个月前我要求加薪 All right. Remember a couple of months ago when l wanted a raise?
算了，别问了 l don't want to do this. And the company wouldn't give me one...
公司不肯 你说你自己掏腰包 and l asked if you would give it to me out of your own pocket...
可是公司怕这么做 And you said the company would not allow it, because it would create jealousy...
会让别的秘书嫉妒 among the other secretaries.
这是真的 还是你不想出钱? Was that true, or did you just not want to pony up the dough?
葛妲，求求你 Greta, please!
史法官，我是李费奇 Judge Stevens, hi! Fletcher Reede.
半小时要出庭 l'm scheduled in your court in half an hour.
我真的很希望能够延期 Judge Stevens, l badly, badly need a continuance.
生病？我是不是生病? lll? Am l ill?
问得好 That is the perfect question for you to ask.
葛妲，帮我说谎 Please lie for me! l remember when you bought me this...
这真是蒂芬妮的古董相框吗 antique frame from Tiffany's-Tiffany's?
跳蚤市场买的烂货 Garage sale. Six-fifty, marked down from ten.
我现在替你加薪 l'll give you the raise!
去你的吧 Here's your raise.
史法官 我知道我还没回答 Hi, Judge Stevens! l know l haven't given you an answer.
病也有很多种 But illness could mean so many things.
请稍候 Can you hold?
喂？妈！ Hello? Mom!
其实我没有休假 Hi! l wasn't really on vacation.
我只是不想和你说话 Because l didn't want to talk to you!
你老爱提爸大便的形状 和颜色 Because you insist on talking about Dad's bowel movements-size, color, frequency!
再见 l'll call you later! Hello?
惨了，我把他挂断了 Oh, damn it! l cut him off.
他是法官耶 l cut off the judge!
葛妲，别走 Greta! Don't leave!
我穿著名牌西装服 跪着求你 I wear a suit a famous brand clothes kneels before you
几年前 小偷爬到我朋友家屋顶 Mr. Reede. Several years ago, a friend had a burglar on her roof.
他跌进厨房 被菜刀割伤大腿 He fell through the skylight, landed on a butcher's knife, cutting his leg.
那小偷反而告我朋友 The burglar sued my friend. He sued my friend!
你们这种律师还帮他胜诉 Because of guys like you, he won!
她得赔小偷六千元 My friend had to pay the burglar $6, 000.
这公平吗? ls that justice?
当然不 No.
我会争取到一万元 l'd have got him ten.
再会，李先生 Good-bye, Mr. Reede. No, wait!
我没听懂问题，再问一遍 我没听懂问题，再问一遍 l didn't understand! Ask me again!
祝你好运 Have a nice day in court.
葛妲 Greta!
我的老天 Hi. God in heaven!
见到你真好，你在忙吗? lt's nice to see you too, Fletcher. Are you busy?
忙得很 Extremely.
好极了，跟我来 Good. Would you follow me, please?
艾先生亲自主持 合伙人委员会 Did you know that the partnership committee is headed by Mr. Allan himself?
你以前是他的属下，对吧? Mm-hmm. You used to work directly for Mr. Allan.
没错 Yeah.
告诉我 Tell me.
他的为人如何? What do you think of him?
他是个脾气又臭又倔的 老顽固 He's a pedantic, pontificating, pretentious bastard!
说一套做一套的假道学 A belligerent old fart! A steaming pile of cow dung!
我只是说说罢了 Figuratively speaking.
真的？真好玩，跟我来 Really? How delightful. This way.
不好意思，打扰了 Pardon me for interrupting.
艾先生，你记得李费奇吧? Mr. Allan, you remember Fletcher Reede?
当然记得，很高兴见到你 Oh, yes! Nice to see you again, Fletcher.
今天我会看你出庭 l'll be observing you in court this afternoon.
我听说你很高明 l've been hearing some good things about you.
费奇正在说你的人有多好 Well, Fletcher has just been telling me how much he thinks of you.
快说呀 你觉得他的人如何? Why don't you tell Mr. Allan? Well, what do you think of him?
他是个脾气又臭又倔的 老顽固 He's a pedantic, pontificating, pretentious bastard.
说一套做一套的假道学 A belligerent old fart. A worthless, steaming pile of cow dung.
我只是说说罢了 Figuratively speaking.
这个笑话真好笑 That's the funniest damn thing l've ever heard!
你真会搞笑 You're a real card, Reede!
我最爱骂人的话 l love a good roast!
骂骂西门吧 Do Simmons!
西门是糟老头儿 Simmons is old!
他早该退休 He should have been out years ago,
可是他怕老婆，不敢待在家 but he can't stay home 'cause he hates his wife!
你们都见过他老婆 You've met her at the Christmas parties.
她就是骂他是低能儿的泼妇 She's the one that gets plastered and calls him a retard.
你呢，你的鼻子比成龙大 And you, Tom. You're the biggest brownnose l've ever seen!
你老爱拍艾先生的马屁 You've got your head so far up
你满嘴都是他的屁味儿 Mr. Allan's ass, l can't tell where you end and he begins!
精彩 Priceless!
你有牙周病，满嘴臭味 You have bad breath caused by gingivitis.
你是个孬种 You couldn't get a porn star off.
你的假发像是路上的死狗 Your hairpiece looks like something that was killed.
我该用梳子整理 l don't know whether to comb it
还是拿铲子把它埋起来? or scrape it off and bury it in lime!
失败者 Loser!
大蠢蛋 ldiot!
胆小鬼 Wimp!
变态佬 Degenerate!
荡妇 Slut!
我快笑破肚皮了 l like your style, Reede! That's what this stuffy company needs!
这样公司才有活力 回头见，王八蛋 A little irreverence! Good! l'll see you later, dick-head!
王八蛋，太精彩了 Dick-head! Priceless!
这小子不得了，王八蛋 Keep your eye on that boy. Dick-head!
第三地方法庭开庭 Third District Court is now in session.
正直的史马歇法官 The honorable Judge Marshall Stevens presiding.
午安，两位律师 Afternoon, Counselors.
可以开始吗? Are we ready to begin?
还不能开始 No, sir! We are not ready to begin...
我的委托人还没到 because my client has not arrived!
走快点，快呀 Hurry up! Move it, move it!
她来搅局了 Here she comes to wreck the day
李先生 Mr. Reede!
对不起 Sorry, Your Honor.
别让他们乱吵 Go, go, go. Lupe, you keep those kids quiet.
我不是开玩笑 l'm not even close to kidding.
抱歉 Sorry.
比利在车上吐 Billy threw up in the car.
你把孩子带到离婚法庭? You brought your kids to your divorce?
博得同情 Sympathy. Well, it's working.
很有用，我很同情他们 l feel sorry for them already. Hmm.
艾小姐，请开始 Miss Appleton, you may begin.
三月六日到六月十二日 From March 6 through June 12...
柯先生请我监视柯太太 l surveilled Mrs. Cole at the behest of Mr. Cole.
柯先生每天七点半左右离家 During that period, l noted that Mr. Cole... left each day between 7:40 and 7:50.
然后柯太太就接待男客 Thereafter Mrs. Cole would frequently have...
他们通常待一至四个钟头 a male visitor arrive and stay from one to four hours.
我拍下这些男客的照片 l was able to take several photographs of the male visitor.
原来如此 l see.
柯太太都和男客做些什么呢 Do you know what Mrs. Cole and her male visitor did... during these frequent... visits?
他们都拉上窗帘 Well, they were pretty good about keeping the shades drawn,
不过我录下一次会面的过程 but l was able to make a recording of one such session.
庭上，根据他们的婚前协议 Your Honor, as you are aware, under the terms of the prenuptial agreement,
要是柯太太红杏出墙 她什么也得不到 if Mrs. Cole commits adultery, she is entitled to nothing.
请允许我播放这卷带子 With your permission, we'd like to play the following tape recording.
宝贝儿，我来也 Here comes big daddy!
天啊 Oh, God! Do it to me!
快上吧，用力，用力 Do it to me! Harder! Harder!
拜托 Oh, come on!
庭上 Your Honor,
录音带上的声音 可能是柯先生 how can it be proved that the male voice on that tape is not Mr. Cole himself?
你比我先生还要厉害 You are such a better lover than my husband!
我抗议 Your Honor, l object!
为什么? And why is that, Mr. Reede?
因为这让我无法辩护 lt's devastating to my case!
不准 Overruled.
说的好 Good call!
我得走了 l gotta go. l haven't cleaned your pool.
轮到你了 Your witness.
李先生，请你发问 All right. Well, Mr. Reede, you may proceed.
怎么说? How?
我得上厕所 Your Honor, would the court be willing to grant me a short bathroom break?
为什么? Can't it wait? Yes, it can.
因为憋尿会造成摄护腺癌 But l've heard that if you hold it, it can damage the prostate gland, making it very difficult to get an erection!
真的吗? ls that true?
没错 lt has to be.
这么说我也得休息一下 Well, in that case, l better take a little break myself.
休息十分钟 But you get back here immediately so we can finish this.
我该怎么办? How am l going to get out of this?
用力想，用力想 Think. Think.
好痛，好痛哦 Think! Owie! Owie!
你到底在干什么? What the hell are you doing?
我在痛殴自己，可以吗? l'm kicking my ass! Do you mind?
我在厕所找到他 他被人毒打 l found him like this in the bathroom, Your Honor. Somebody beat the hell out of him.
是谁干的? Who did this?
一个疯子 A madman, Your Honor!
一个狗急跳墙的傻子 A desperate fool at the end of his pitiful rope!
他长什么样子? What did he look like?
六尺二，一百八十磅 About 6'2", 180 pounds,
有点暴牙，拙拙的 big teeth, kind of gangly.
法警，请警卫搜遍法院 Bailiff, have the deputy search the building.
是的 Yes, sir.
安静，安静 Order! Order!
我不得不将本庭延至 明晨九点 Under the circumstances, l have no choice but to recess this case... until 9:00 a. m. tomorrow morning.
除非你还能继续出庭 Unless, of course, you feel you can still proceed.
可以吗? Can you?
可以 Yes,
我可以 l can.
我很佩服你的勇气 l admire your courage, Mr. Reede.
我让你休息一下 然后再开庭 We'll take a short recess so that you can compose yourself, and then we'll get started.
给 Here you go.
喂? Hello?
爸 Dad?
麦斯，你好吗? Max? How's it going?
很好，你知道隔壁的保罗吗 Great. You know Paul and Emanuel from across the street?
知道呀 Yeah. Uh-huh. Well, they never want to play baseball with me.
他想打球，我说我要和你玩 But l told them l'm playing tonight with my dad.
晚上他能一起玩吗? So now they want to play. ls that okay?
当然，人越多越热闹 Sure. The more the merrier.
酷毙了 你要当荷西坎塞柯? Coolest! Do you wanna be Jose Canseco?
当然，我才会打变化球 Oh, yeah. Who else is gonna hit that famous Nomo slider?
李先生 Mr. Reede. l gotta go now, Max.
我得走了，待会见 再见 再见，爸 l'll see you in a couple hours. Okay? Bye. Bye, Dad.
他真的要来，我去换衣服 He's really coming! l'm gonna go change.
去吧 Okay, go ahead!
好耶 Yeah!
李先生 Mr. Reede!
李先生的头 Mr. Reede! Mr. --
我的律师有点古怪，别怕 This is my lawyer. He's a little unorthodox.
你记得录音带上的肯尼吧? Mr. Reede, you remember Kenneth Falk, the man from the tape.
我忘不了 How could l forget?
你好 Hey, how you doing?
我被打下十八层地狱 谢谢你 l've slipped into the seventh circle of hell! Thank you.
我们不是该练习证词吗? You? Shouldn't we be going over our testimony right now?
基本上，我要解释录音带 Basically, the plan is, l walk you through the tape.
一步一步，由我发问 Step-by-step, l ask you questions.
我们照你的话回答 And we give the explanation you came up with.
没错 Exactly.
我们只要说谎就行了 All we gotta do is lie.
很简单嘛 That sounds simple enough.
可不是? Doesn't it!
最后我问你 Then l'll finish up with dramatic questions.
傅先生 你和柯太太没有做… Something like: Mr. Falk, isn't it true that you and Mrs. Cole... have never made Lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo, lo--
我办不到 Ugh! Oh, God! l can't do it.
他们会说谎 所以我问不出口 l can't finish the question if l know the answer is a lie.
请继续，李先生 You may proceed, Mr. Reede.
我请傅肯尼做证 Respondent calls... Kenneth Falk.
请举起右手 Raise your right hand.
你发誓你所说全部属实吗? Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help you God?
我发誓 l do! l mean--
我发誓 l do.
傅先生 Mr. Falk.
你认识莎曼珊吗? Do you know my client, Samantha Cole?
认识 Yes.
你和她没有肉体上的关系… lsn't it true that your relationship with my client is entirely platonic?
我抗议 l object, Your Honor!
你抗议自己? To yourself?
是的，我想重新发问 Yeah. But l would like to... rephrase the question.
请问你和柯太太的关系 Mr. Falk, would l be accurate...
是否纯属职业上的往来? if l described your relationship with Mrs. Cole as totally professional?
我抗议，并要求惩戒 l object, Your Honor, and l move to strike!
我不管你耍什么花招 Mr. Reede, l don't know what you're on,
你最好快说出重点 but you better get to the point and quick.
谢谢你 Thank you, sir.
你和她没有肉体关系，才怪 ls your relationship with my client entirely platonic?
你和她的关系是不是… Not! ls not your relationship with my client:
坏小子 "Boink! Bad baby, bad baby!"
你真的没和她… Did you ever not make lo--
李先生 Did you-Mr. Reede!
你每次都有上她，对吧? You had sex with her every time you met, didn't you? Didn't you!
大骗子 Liar!
他在侮辱证人 He's badgering the witness.
这是他的证人 lt's his witness.
你上她、干她、让她爽歪歪 You slammed her! You dunked her donuts! You gave her dog a"snaussage"!
你像塞火鸡一样满足她 You stuffed her like a Thanksgiving turkey!
好啦，我让她欲仙欲死 All right, it's true, okay! l humped her brains out!
高兴了吧? There! Now you happy?
我没有问题了 No further questions.
我没有问题 Um-No questions.
请你下来 You may step down.
我还敢请你叫下位证人吗? Do l dare ask you to call your next witness?
我没有证人了 l have no further witnesses, Your Honor.
你搞什么？请我作证呀 What are you doing? Call me!
你搞不清楚状况 我不能说谎 You do not understand. l can't lie.
八点十五分前 我都得说实话 l can't do anything dishonest until 8:15 tonight!
给我听好，我要我的钱 Listen, you bastard! l want my money!
我的人渣律师突然良心发现 l am not going to end up a 31-year-old divorcee on welfare...
不能害我变成31岁 的穷困失婚妇人 because my scumbag attorney had a sudden attack of conscience!
31岁? Thirty-one?
如果你没有证人 lf Mr. Reede has no further witnesses,
我就得判柯先生胜诉 then l have no choice but to rule in favor of--
庭上 Your Honor!
我请柯太太作证 l call Samantha Cole to the stand.
安静，安静 Order.
安静！别吵了！ Order! Order!
坐下 Knock it off! Sit down!
我完全是出于好奇心 Mr. Reede, it is out of sheer morbid curiosity...
才允许你继续这场闹剧 l'm allowing this... freak show to continue.
柯太太，请吧 Mrs. Cole... if you dare.
柯太太 Mrs. Cole...
这是你驾照的副本吗? is this a copy of your driver's license?
是的 Yes.
上面写你是金发 lt says here you're a blonde. Are you?
天啊 God
你不记得，傅先生应该记得 lf you don't remember, perhaps Mr. Falk will.
我是褐发 Brunette.
也许录音带上有记录 We can play the tape again. Maybe it's on there.
我是褐发 l'm a brunette!
谢谢你 Thank you. Now let's see.
我看看，体重105磅 你的咪咪就有那么重 "Weight: 105." Yeah! ln your bra.
我抗议 想得美 Your Honor, l object! You would!
臭小子 Bastard! Hag!
闭嘴 Quiet!
不准 Overruled!
体重 Weight?
118磅 One-eighteen.
好啦，127磅 All right, fine, fine. l'm 127.
上面写你生于一九六四年 Uh-huh. And it says here you were born in 1964,
这也不是真的，对吧? but that's not true either, is it?
没错 ls it! No.
请你读出生证明上的 出生年份 Will you tell me what it says here on your birth certificate under "date of birth"?
我抗议，这与此案无关 Your Honor, what does this have to do with anything?
不准 Overruled.
柯太太，请回答 Mrs. Cole, answer the question.
一九六五年 "1965."
让我搞清楚 Now let me get this straight.
你谎称年龄 好让自己老一岁 That would mean that you lied about your age to make yourself older.
哪个女人会把年龄说老呢? But why would any woman want to do that?
我谎称年龄才能结婚 l changed it so l could get married.
真相能解放你 And the truth shall set you free!
她谎报年龄 结婚时才十七岁 My client lied about her age!
那算是未成年少女 She was only 17 when she got married, which makes her a minor,
在加州，未成年少年必须有 监护人同意才能订合约 and in the great state of California, no minor can enter into any legal contract...
包括… without parental consent, including--
婚前协议书 Prenuptial agreements.
婚前协议书，这份合约无效 Prenuptial agreements! This contract is void!
她和多少男人上床也不重要 The fact that my client has been ridden more than Seattle Slew is irrelevant.
离婚条例规定 Standard Community Property applies,
她应分得夫妻财产的一半 and she is entitled to half of the marital assets,
1139.5万美元 or $11. 395 million!
乔丹上网，得分 Jordan fades back. Swoosh!
我赢啦 And that's the game!
没有问题了，庭上 Nothing further, Your Honor.
安静，安静 Order. Order. Order!
根据这项新证据 ln light of this new evidence,
本庭判柯太太胜诉 the court must rule in favor of Mrs. Cole.
她可分得夫妻财产的一半 Yes! She is hereby awarded half the marital assets.
这小子成功了 The son of a bitch pulled it off!
我不知道她未成年 l didn't know!
没有用，协议书无效 lt doesn't matter. The contract's void.
安静，安静 Order. Order.
双方同意分享监护权，对吧 l understand both parties have agreed to joint custody.
没错 ls that correct? Yes.
没错 Yes. No.
不对，我要争取监护权 l'm contesting custody.
什么? What? lf l get sole custody,
我独得监护权就能多得 一万元 that's another ten grand in child support payments.
你刚分得一千一百万元 You just won $11 million!
你说过，我才是受害者 Hey, l'm the victim here. You said it yourself.
我要他付出代价 Now l'm gonna hit him where it hurts.
你说他是个好父亲 But you-you said he was a good father.
又怎样? So?
柯太太是否同意分享监护权? Well, Mr. Reede, do we have an agreement on custody or not?
不同意 No.
好吧 l see.
十九日九时举行监护权听证会 ln that case, there will be a custody hearing on the 19th at 9:00 a. m.
退庭 Court is adjourned.
咱们走吧 Come on, let's go.
爹地 Daddy!
别叫了，否则我就要你好看 You stop that whining, or l'll give you something to whine about!
我要找爹地 l wanna go with Daddy!
好了，别担心 Come here, kids. Come on. lt's all right. Don't you worry.
我答应有时间就去陪你 l promise we'll be together, whatever l have to do.
没事了 lt's okay. lt's okay.
拜托，放他们走 Oh, for God's sake, will you give me those? They're mine!
放开爹地 Let go of Daddy! Let go of him! Let go of Daddy!
我们现在就要走了！卢佩，走！ We're leaving now! Lupe, come on!
你该写支票了… Don't you have some checks to write? You haven't paid for them yet.
孩子真是打赢官司的工具 l love children.
你干得真好，合伙人 They give you so much leverage in a case like this. You did an incredible job, partner.
你看看，他高兴的说不出话 Look at him. He's stunned. He can't believe it.
庭上，我能上前吗? Your Honor, may l please approach the bench?
退庭了 We're adjourned, Mr. Reede.
我们犯了大错 Your Honor, l think we've made a big mistake.
我很累，也很不耐烦 Mr. Reede, l am tired and very cranky.
我知道，但是这不对 l know, but this is just... wrong, isn't it?
我玩弄了司法程序 l manipulated the system.
你被说服并不表示我是对的 Just because you bought it doesn't mean l'm right. lt's a technicality!
我不能容忍你嘲笑我的判决 Young man, having my judgement mocked in my own court... is not something l'm prepared to tolerate!
那些孩子会被变态杀手收养 Well, tell that to the kids when they're adopted... by the Manson family!
你再乱说话 我就告你藐视公堂 One more word out of you, Mr. Reede, and l'll hold you in contempt!
我告我自己藐视公堂 l hold myself in contempt!
你也一样 Why should you be any different?
法警，把他带下去 Bailiff, take him away!
他是好父亲 孩子也不是工具 This man is a good father, and children are not leverage!
别这样，我得陪儿子打球 Oh, no, don't do this! l have a date to play ball with my son!
我不能迟到 我是荷西坎塞柯 l can't be late! lt's my last chance! l'm Jose Canseco!
我是天生好手 l'm Jose Canseco!
电话，我可以打一通电话 Phone call! Phone call!
我可以打一通电话 l get a phone call! l get a phone call! l get a phone call!
是我，求求你，别挂断 Hello? Audrey, it's me. Don't hang up!
我没空，我们得赶八点班机 l can't talk right now. Our flight leaves at 8:00.
什么? What?
我不能再让你伤害麦斯 l'm taking Max someplace where you can't do this anymore.
等一下，我终于良心发现 Audrey, wait! The most amazing thing has happened to me.
我已经重新做人了 l'm a changed man!
带一千元到法院保释我 Just come to the courthouse with $1, 000 and bail me out.
喂? Hello? Hello?
时间到了 Time's up, pal.
让我再打一通 No, just one more call. Just one more call.
好，走吧 Okay, let's go.
好了吗? Ready?
好了 Yeah.
去开门好吗? Will you get the door, please?
好 Okay.
谢谢 Thank you.
李先生，你被交保了 Mr. Reede, you made bail.
葛妲，谢天谢地 Greta! Oh, thank God!
怎么样？你被强暴了吗? Am l too late? Have you been sexually molested yet?
我可以待会再来 Because l could circle the block.
你怎么知道呢? How did you know l was here?
别的秘书打电话跟我说 One of the other secretaries called me at home,
你在艾先生面前据理力争 said you went all noble in front of Mr. Allan.
我被炒鱿鱼了，太好了 Yeah, l think l'm fired. lsn't that great?
我想自己开业，需要工作吗 l'll start my own firm. Do you need a job?
你付不起我的薪水 l don't think you can afford me.
我得去开车，他们要到机场 Oh, man, l gotta get my car. Audrey's on her way to the airport.
我可能会失去麦斯 l could lose Max forever. l can't let that happen.
我太爱他了 l love him!
说实话真好，我好爱我儿子 You know, this truth stuff is pretty cool.
我好爱我儿子 l love my son! l love my son! l love my son! l love my son!
要零钱吗？全都拿去 Hey, need some change? Take everything!
金钱不能带来快乐 But it's not gonna make you happy.
我好爱我儿子… l love my son! l love my son!
我好爱我儿子… l love my son!
你们来得正是时候 Hey, there you are! Hi. Just in time.
这是我一生最快乐的时刻 Oh, this is the happiest moment of my entire life.
我…我们也是 O-Oh! Well, m-me, m-mine-Well, ours... also.
小伙子，我要给你看样东西 Hey, gipper. l have something for you, young man.
小心，魔掌来了 Ooh, watch yourself. lt's the claw!
魔掌要来抓你了 Ooh, the claw's coming at ya.
你好怕魔掌 Ooh, you're scared of the claw. You're scared of the claw.
杰利 Jerry. Jerry. Huh?
你不必这样 lt's okay. You don't have to--
前往波士顿的乘客请登机 Tower Air flight 1511 to Boston is now boarding.
那是我们 Ooh, that's us.
是啊 Yeah.
可以走了吗? Ready to go?
可以，你呢? Yes. You ready?
太好了 Okay. Great.
吉姆鲁贝，请到安全室。 Jim Rubing, please report to Airport Security.
让开 Excuse me!
波士顿班机 在哪个闸口登机? What gate is flight 1511 leaving from? lt's an emergency!
123号登机口，来不及了 Gate number 123, but you'll never make it. Flight's already boarding.
要赶上班机得花半个小时 lt takes more than a half hour to get through security.
明天七点还有到波士顿的班机 lf you want to go to Boston, there's another flight leaving tomorrow morning at 7:00 a. m.
航班号12... Flight number one-twenty--
欢迎搭乘前往波士顿的班机 Ladies and gentlemen, welcome aboard flight 1511 from Los Angeles to Boston's Logan Airport.
我们马上起飞… We'll be departing shortly, and if you need help stowing your carry-on items--
要我帮忙吗? 不用 Honey, can l help you? l'm fine.
真的? Are you sure?
我自己会拆 Jerry, l can open the bag!
您想喝点什么? Would you like anything to drink before takeoff?
只要是酒都好 Yes. Anything with alcohol, please.
奥卓莉 Audrey.
我的酒呢? How about that drink?
麦斯！麦斯！ Max! Max!
麦斯！等等我！ Max! Wait!
这辆最好 That oughta do it.
嘿 Hey!
谢了，真好开 Thanks! lt's running great!
冲啊 Max!
嘿，麦斯 Hey! Max!
嘿 Hey!
麦斯，我来了 Max! l'm coming!
麦斯 Max!
麦斯，你在哪儿? Max! Max, where are you?
我爱你 l love you.
谢谢你 Thank you.
这不是我想听的回答 That wasn't exactly the answer l was looking for.
多谢你? Thank you very much?
对不起 l'm sorry.
只是… lt's just--
我太操之过急 Too fast?
不，我们只是… lt was too fast, wasn't it? No, i-it's--
没有默契？我可以改进 Chemistry? Whatever it is, we can work on it.
不是，都是… No, no, no. lt's just that--
我的天，是费奇 Oh, my God, it's Fletcher!
不是，这与费奇无关 No, no, this has nothing to do with Fletcher.
费奇在外头 No, honey, it's Fletcher.
爸 What? Dad?
我赶到了 l made it! l'm late, but l made it!
他在干什么? What is he doing?
他来送飞机 He came to see us off.
挥挥手 Wave.
我不让你走 l won't let you go!
靠 Oh, shit!
Da-da-da-da-da-da-da Da-da-da-da
塔台，这是1511班机 Control one-nine, this is Tower 1511, heavy.
我们可以起飞 Ready for takeoff.
嘿 Hey!
那是什么? What was that?
好像是只鞋子 Looked like a shoe.
停下来，靠边停下来 Pull over! Pull this thing over!
塔台，有个蠢蛋偷开登机梯 Control one-nine, some idiot has hijacked a flight of stairs.
我们得停下来 We're gonna stop this plane.
不 Yeah! No-o-o-o-o!
救命啊 Help
你们都很尽职 You people are all doing a wonderful job!
请退后 That's far enough, folks.
他是我先生 He's my husband--
他是我的前夫 was my husband.
过去吧 All right, go ahead. Okay.
麦斯，跟杰利留在这儿 Max, you stay here with Jerry, and l'll be right back, okay?
费奇 Audrey!
好消息 Great news! Fletcher!
我的腿断了，暂时不必坐牢 Both my legs are broken, so they can't take me right to jail.
你这是干什么?你疯啦? Fletcher, what were you doing? Are you out of your mind?
不，我的脑筋清楚得很 No, l'm thinking clear. l've never been this clear!
爸 Dad?
小不点儿 Creep.
我有点心急 He was getting kind of upset.
你没事吧? Are you all right?
没事 Yeah.
我的心好痛 l'm hurting here, though.
我是个傻瓜 你一直在我身边 l'm a dope, Max. All this time you've been here...
我却不懂得珍惜 and l could see you anytime, but l didn't.
听到你们要搬走，我就在想 Then your mom told me you were moving to Boston, and l started thinking.
以后我想看看你，陪你玩耍 都没有办法了 l could be sitting around sometime and... want to look at you and hold you and play with you, and l won't be able to.
没有你，我会很难过 l don't think l'm gonna do too well with that.
我在这世上最爱你 l love you more than anything else in the world, Max,
这是实话，今天我不能说谎 and you know it's true. l couldn't say it if it wasn't true. Not today.
我好爱你，我不会再伤害你 l love you, and l'll never hurt you again.
他说的是实话，他不能说谎 He's telling the truth, Mom. He's not allowed to lie.
我许愿要他不能说谎话 l made a wish, and anything Dad says today has to be the truth.
麦斯 Max.
现在是八点四十五分 lt's 8:45.
你是八点十五分许的愿 You made the wish at 8:15.
这半小时我都能说谎 l've been able to lie for the last half hour.
你在说谎 So you weren't--
不，我说的是实话 No, it was the truth!
我永远都会跟你说实话 l just wanted to be honest with you. l always want to be honest with you.
我们非得去波士顿吗? Mom, do we have to go to Boston?
你们不必去 No, Max, you don't have to go.
好耶 Yeah!
不过我一定得去 l, on the other hand, do have to.
我得去管理医院 A hospital to run.
要是你改变心意，欢迎你来 That's an open-ended ticket if you ever change your mind.
谢谢你 Thank you.
他的父亲回来了 Looks like he's got his father back.
一年后
祝你生日快乐，麦斯 Happy birthday, dear Maximus
祝你生日快乐 Happy birthday to you
许个愿 Okay, Max, make a wish.
等等，也许你不该许愿 Ahhh, wait! l don't know if we should do this.
别紧张，那种事不会再发生 Oh, Fletcher, come on. What are the odds of that happening again?
那也是 Yeah, l guess you're right.
麦斯，许愿吧 Okay, Max, go ahead.
爸 妈 Mom? Dad?
麦斯 Max!
你许愿要爸妈和好吗? Did you wish for your mom and l to get back together again?
才不，我要一双直排轮鞋 No, l wished for Rollerblades.
你来切蛋糕吧 Do you want to cut the cake...
孩子的爸 Dad?
好吧 l'd love to.
可是我的手好痛 But l have this horrible pain in my arm.
不好，魔掌来了 Oh, no, it's the claw!
谁也阻挡不了魔掌 No one can stop the claw!
谁也阻挡不了魔掌 No one can stop it!
谁也阻挡不了魔掌 Nothing can stop the claw!
如果我是拳王 lf l was a boxer,
我就把那些打得晃来晃去 l would bounce those things like Sugar Ray Leonard. l'm sorry.
你把孩子带到离婚法庭? Brought your kids to your divorce?
博得同情 Sympathy.
很有用，我很同情他们 Well, it's working! l feel sorry for them already.
你得付出严重代价 For this you will pay a terrible price.
很有用，我很同情他们 Well, it's working! l feel sorry for them already.
柯太太 Mrs. Cole...
一只鹅 a goose.
包括… lncluding--
婚前协议书 Prenuptial agreements.
婚前协议书 Prenuptial agreements
我会争取到一万元 No! l'd have got him ten.
再会，李先生 Good-bye, Mr. Reede.
不，等等，我有… No! Wait! l didn't know she had--
草 Oh, shit.
我看看，体重105磅 Now let's see."Weight: 105"?
你的咪咪就有那么重 Yeah! ln your bra.
我抗议 Your Honor, l object!
想得美 You would!
夸张的演员 Overactor! Jezebel!
他叫我这么说的 He put me up to it.
才怪 Yeah, sure he did.
他们都想整我 Oh, no. They're onto me.
谨以此片献给杰森·柏纳德